The Art Of Argument: How to Win Arguments

The art of argument: How to Win Arguments

Arguments will always be a part of human relationships. The difference in upbringing and beliefs make each person unique. Often times, people view a disagreement in a negative light. While getting into a squabble with another person can be stressful, it has its upside as well. When you argue, you open doors to change. As with any other person, we all need to adjust and learn the value of meeting half way.

People argue differently. Some shout while others sulk in the corner. The key to winning a fight is to identify the person’s tactical maneuvers. You need to learn the art of disarming your opponents with ploys of your own.

Some people like to shout when they bicker. These people get upset even with the most trifle issues. Their screams set alarms off and their offenses ring forever in your ears. People who shout lack control of their emotions. By telling them to put a lid on it will only make matters worse. It’s always about power and aggression. In cases like these, you should not fight fire with fire. They will only shut you out and refuse to listen to what you have to say. What you can do is back off and give that other person a chance to cool down. Then, you need to approach them calmly and tactfully. Make them aware of their unhealthy way of venting out emotions and tell them that you won’t engage when they are in that mode. If their outburst persists, leave. People like them have anger management issues that can only be resolved with the help of an expert.

If, on the other hand, they like to remain quiet and stoic when they are upset, you have to stop the confrontation. The more you force it out of them, the more difficult they become. They will often leave you frustrated and helpless because they won’t respond to self-defense. This may be their defense mechanism at work, and this may be their way of feeling safe during times of stress. Try writing what you feel because while they can tune you out, they won’t be able to tune out the written argument. If they are your friend, they will read your letter. Never suppress important issues. What you need to do is broach the subject calmly. Try to lighten their mood and brighten their spirits by being humble and objective.

There are also people that simply like to sulk when they get upset. They slam doors and mutter a lot, and when you do ask them what is wrong, they keep their answers abrupt and vague. While shouters are difficult to deal with, these people can be just as destructive. The secret is to deal with them on neutral ground. Give them time and find ways to come to an agreement.

Whatever type of argument you find yourself in, it always helps to be the bigger person. Never blow your fuse and try to be rational about the situation. People are likely to respect those who see things as they are. Never sugarcoat your opinions, but you also have to be diplomatic about it. After all, the best way to earn their respect is to show them that you value their thoughts and emotions as well.